So, you don’t want to hang from a cliff? That’s okay, me neither. But, where do you want to be? Can you find your own limits and push yourself beyond them? That’s what this is about.
The smart person begins enhancement by examining where they are at right now. Whether we are talking about career success, personal goals, or relationship issues…these factors apply. The truth is, you are often the greatest inhibitor to your own success. I challenge you to get out a pencil and paper (or hey, open a word document), and get brutally honest – see what your thoughts are, and how you answer the 6 questions below.
6 Questions to Ask: Do You Limit Yourself?
1. What Box Have you put Yourself in? – What do you tell yourself about who you are? If someone asked you “who are you?” Do you define yourself by what you do or in relation to other people? Start looking at how you label yourself because that will tell you a little about your starting point…and possibly your sticking point. There is a big difference between someone who introduces himself as a ‘janitor’ and the person who says he is a ‘future real estate investor who maintains buildings to save capital.’ These people are at very different places.
2. What do you Tell Yourself? – Realize it or not, we have an internal dialogue running all the time about life. You might tell yourself ‘I can never get that job’ or ‘I can never compete with her’ etc…what are you telling yourself – both about your career, or your abilities? It can be a very limiting factor. Think about people’s reaction to taking a math course…some say ‘I’m not very good at math’ before they even begin. Don’t be cutting yourself off at the knees.
3. Are you Truly Open to Feedback? – Fragile people react harshly to negative feedback…secure people use that as information. Everything in the world is information coming your way – whether it is about your business strengths/weaknesses, personal traits, or your appearance. People have a tendency to ignore information they don’t like, but that’s not helpful. You don’t have to agree with information you get – but don’t judge or disregard it – analyze the information to improve yourself. Be open, and ask questions.
4. Do Others Set Your Limits? – Often we are limited because we have learned to only rely on other people as a source of direction and definition in our lives. Sometimes you will even hear people say ‘Oh Jonathan, he’s not very good with people, etc..’ So maybe this information begins to limit Jonathan for the rest of his life because he actually starts to believe he is not good with people! Don’t be Jonathan. Don’t let other people set your limits…they are one of many sources of information. Treat them that way.
5. What Do you Believe is Possible for You? – You can only reach as high as your aspirations. If all you believe you can be is your poorly paying job, that’s all you are ever going to be. If you truly believe that it is possible for you to be more, you’ll seek to be. You’ll use your job as a stepping-stone, not a safe rut your will never attempt to leave.
6. Are you Honest about your Real vs. Ideal Self – People are often frustrated because there is a huge difference between the person they are, and the ideal person they wish they were. Sometimes they try to falsely mimic their ‘ideal self’ and put up an image that is not authentic. Get honest is defining exactly who you are right now, in this moment (real self) – then define who you want to be (ideal self). Try to see how you can get that real self to truly become that person you want to be. Set up steps for yourself and get to work.